278 - ROAD HOUSE 2024

It’s time to not be nice. Doug Liman’s remake of the Swayze classic and previous episode is here on the Primes and we’re taking a trip to Florida with Jake Gyllenhaal in wild man mode, shirtless, angry, fighting and fussing. Will we dig deep into our feelings for CGI fighting? Will we praise Arturo Castro, Billy Magnussen and Jessica Williams? Will the swordfish shown at the start amount to anything? Some of those questions have positive responses, so grab a bottle, smash a table and remember the famous phrases of Elwood Dalton. “The hospital’s 25 minutes away.”

BONUS - TAYLOR SWIFT THE ERA'S TOUR (TAYLOR'S VERSION) COMMENTARY

Oh good lord we did a silly thing.

Two guys who know little about Swift watch 3 hours (not the acoustic post-credits set) of songs, play games, talk Minnie Mouse as Poor Things and explore tge generation that follows.

We had a sync failure so ignore the first countdown, commentary starts 5 seconds into the film, at 16 minutes into the episode exactly.


277 - BEFORE THE DEVIL KNOWS YOU'RE DEAD

Andrew brings sadness and heaviness in the form of Sidney Lumet’s final film to Johnny, but have no fear because there is still fun to be had. Two Aunt Mays in one film? You bet we’re throwing out Madame Web chat, weirdly contemplate Ricky Stanicky and run through the strange trailers on the blu ray of the movie that do not set you up for the film ahead.

276 - ROCKNROLLA

It’s a Guy hangout when Johnny decides, nay insists, we cover Ritchie’s intended start of a trilogy of London crime flicks and Andrew dons his best ‘East End Accent’ to talk Tom Wilkinson giving it something hard, Mark Strong’s voice, that late 00s colour grading nightmare and just where the proposed rest of the franchise actually went.

275 - PINEAPPLE EXPRESS

Happy Valentine’s Day! This year we’re celebrating with a bromance, both between Andrew and Johnny and Seth Rogen and… James Franco (No problems there, totally fine, all good, mmhmmm) with a stoner action flick that brought David Gordon Green and Danny McBride together, a movie that would lead to Universal spending $400m for Exorcist rights (and rites). We talk weed, Gary Cole at a film junket, Amber Heard, the TV show Sit Down, Shut Up and background artists.

274 - THERE WILL BE BLOOD

WARNING This episode has two hosts sometimes coughing, the sickness is real!

It’s been nearer 2 years than not that we’ve given a regular episode, life has been wild and hectic and the pandemic run broke everything. Now we return to get the waters tested only to find it’s actually oil down there, and we’re watching Paul Thomas Anderson’s Oscar-winning masterpiece about Daniel Day Lewis as a messy bitch who lives for the drama.

BONUS - THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE 3 (FINAL SEQUENCE) COMMENTARY

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

What’s scarier than the notion of another hour and forty minutes in Tom Six’s ‘shocking’ ‘button-pushing’ mind? We’re watching Eric Roberts in a prison-set Centipede movie, and finding anything to talk about whilst what technically counts as video synced to audio running over 70 minutes, and thus is a feature film, plays out. Not worth watching along with us, just listen and play trivia games like a normal podcast.

Commentary begins at 00:07:43

BONUS - THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE 2 (FULL SEQUENCE) UK CUT COMMENTARY

First off, legally we can only watch the UK Cut version so there may be sync problems at times due to, ya know, the original cut being rejected over where we record.

Johnny recalls his FrightFest experiences with this film and Laurence R. Harvey, while Andrew spends most of the time playing games because there’s literally nothing in this film to discuss besides ‘Mike Leigh coulda made something with this’.

Commentary begins at 00:11:44

BONUS - THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE (FIRST SEQUENCE) COMMENTARY

Halloween season is here, and Johnny’s dreams are coming true. Andrew is surgically attached to a microphone to watch the first of three movies Tom Six dared to dream about putting people arse to mouth in order to craft some sort of us-species insectoid. Erm… Good luck?

Commentary begins at 00:11:34

273 - NATIONAL TREASURE: BOOK OF SECRETS

Cage March ends with a second dose of Benjamin Franklin Gates, this time we’re dealing with Dame Helen Mirren having to fall back in love with Jon Voight, just why is Ty Burrell here, and what’s the deal with the upcoming series, is it going to be Gates-based? We’re done, at least, with treasure protecting for the moment.

271 - LEAVING LAS VEGAS

Pour one out for our thespian Nic Cage as he wins an Oscar bloating and stumbling to a decidedly devastating end, whilst Elisabeth Shue suffers so much throughout. Johnny takes his first stroll through, Andrew meanwhile faces up to watching a film he never wanted to return to. Heavy heavy stuff.

270 - MATCHSTICK MEN

It’s CAGE MARCH (Cage Madness) and we’re kicking off with Ridley Scott’s con artist drama featuring a dancing Sam Rockwell and Bruce McGill. Andrew and Johnny talk a trip to see The Godfather, Nic Cage pops in for a spot of thespian chat and The Upcoming Oscar Fan Favourite poll is brought into discussion.

269 - ADAM

It’s a late night recording for Andrew and Johnny, as they take a look at perfect goddess Rose Byrne’s career, and discuss Hugh Dancy’s Will Graham performance. There’s tangents aplenty in reminiscing about 2000s twinkly indie music, space room decorations and Peter Gallagher’s eyebrows (OH MAN).

267 - HOT SHOTS

There are those out there who can fly, then there are those that can fly well, then of course there are those who can fly the best. This is a podcast about a film about those people. Andrew’s childhood comedy bible is brought to Johnny on a plate, wherein discussions of Charlie Sheen’s career, body horror in cinema and the film Top Gun help pad a run time. Topper Harley Forever!

266 - TITAN A.E.

Well, look, we’re embarrassed. We were certain that covering Roar instead of Raw was a one-off, and we were gonna watch the Palme D’or winning Titane this week, but… Disney+ didn’t have it, I was misled, and so we watch Don Bluth’s mega-flop 2D-3D hybrid space animation. In our defense, it has a gender-fluid lead, a bunch of crazy people together believing this person to be someone they aren’t and a prologue with childhood trauma, so it’s basically the same film as Titane, ok?

BONUS - TICK, TICK... BOOM! COMMENTARY

Happy holidays to all! Johnny and Andrew are back in-person, and opening presents, as they watch their favourite film of 2021, talking Sondheim, Cats, Lin-Manuel Miranda, adventures in Oslo, Vanessa Hudgens’ filmography and also a nice pop-in of friend of the show Richard Kind. Come join the fun by syncing up with the film on Netflix, the commentary starts at 00:18:29

264 - ROAR

Ok, so, there was a bit of a mistake, this was meant to be us watching Julia Ducournau’s Raw in the build-up to us covering Titane next year, but it seems we got the wrong disk in so here’s us watching a movie about living with lions and tigers and hairy men, oh my! Andrew discusses seeing this film in a packed cinema, and Johnny rates animals based on how he’d most be comfortable living with them.