Idiot vs Arsehole - the podcast equivalent of a hostage negotiation.
Best friends, Kelvin and Crease, can find reasons to disagree about almost everything, from the ranking of smells, to the temptations of cannibalism, and the nightmare of wobbly bones. Armed with a list of moral dilemmas, hypothetical situations, news stories, and anecdotes, Crease must hold Kelvin’s interest for as long as possible. But Kelvin is a hard man to please.
Originally recorded live, as part of an online radio show, this comedy podcast is provocative and unruly. Hosted by Kelvin Bilsland and Richard Creasey.
Expect strong language / adult content.
We also upload clips, short films and sketch shows on YouTube.
Email: theradiofacecomedy@gmail.com
Should we be eating meat? It’s a thorny subject, and confronted by his own hypocrisy, Kelvin blames the animals.
Still, at the very least he thinks Crease has some interesting questions this week. It’s a shame, then, that the last question is so spectacularly idiotic that it makes everyone stupider.
From our plans for the apocalypse, to humankind’s prospects in the far reaches of space, this episode suggests we’re in trouble on pretty much every scale.
We also discuss - and then have to attempt - a "controlled stabbing", before Crease struggles to comprehend why Kelvin wants to have sex with himself. The usual nonsense, but this week, we actually roll around on the floor while we stab each other.
This episode covers a range of topics, from sexy sea dragons, to a death pact that ends badly no matter who survives. However, our conversation about useless super-powers gets interrupted by a call from one of our listeners, “Kittens”, who has a distinctive way of describing things - much to Kelvin’s frustration.
Sensitive soul, Crease, wants us to estimate how many animals we’ve inadvertently killed. Whereas, pedantic soul, Kelvin, thinks he has a better question. After that, we demoralise crap ghosts, design the perfect genitals… and Kelvin thoroughly dismantles The Walrus Topic.
Crease has murdered someone. Dramatic pause. That’s the hypothetical situation he poses at the start of this week’s episode. But it’s when Kelvin explains why he, personally, couldn’t kill anyone, that things really come off the rails. Later, Kelvin is incredibly rude to some listeners who call in to the show, and Crease asks, unrelatedly, whether we need to start giving ourselves a positive PR spin.
This episode, we discuss the possibility of planes not being real and of Jesus being a gigantic, depraved maniac. Fine. But it’s when Crease broaches the topic of babies that he unleashes an anger in Kelvin that cannot be contained.