All aboard the Battleship Potemkast, where two comedians and a film critic try to talk about movies, games and kickboxing. This is very rarely the case, instead leaping into topics as blue as the ocean they sail. Featuring segments such as What We Watched, a Creative Corner, the Gay's Gaming Gulag and updates from the Crew's Log.
Setting sail each Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
We're back! We're here! The Battleship Potemkast is brought to a new level, as Stephen King is reflected upon in celebration of It, Quartermaster Stoakes squirms in the face of Arachnophobia, and Captain Cook is racist towards Italians. It's a podcast of thrills, chills and the worst movie audiences imaginable.
Music by Kevin MacLeod
Buy Mother and Monster here.
Movies movies movies! How unusual for a movie podcast like the Battleship Potemkast to talk about movies, inbetween HMS Gulag's interruptions. Captain Cook uses the podcast to let his emotions through, fart fetishes are discovered in Batman and Harley Quinn, and Quartermaster Stoakes indulges in the lesbian power fantasy of Atomic Blonde.
Music by Kevin MacLeod
Buy Mother and Monster here -> www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B073JRDW1S/re…ther+and+monster
Having successfully fended off the HMS Gulag, the Battleship Boys go to the other side of the table (curtain) at the Hull Comic Con alongside Hannah Spearitt from S Club 7, Russ & Ross & the Andy Serkis of Princess Leia to make friends. Meanwhile, Cpt. Cook is bewildered by Valerian, Quartermaster Stoakes relives his glory days, and one young boy makes the bravest rebellion possible.
Music by Kevin MacLeod, S Club 7 & Balkan Beatbox
Buy Mother and Monster here -> www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B073JRDW1S/re…ther+and+monster
In tribute to the late great George Romero, the Battleship Boys return for a week of comic cons, comic cons, and more comic cons! Specifically, San Diego & Hull! Meanwhile, Tom Hardy's eyes win World War 2, Quartermaster Stoakes accuses all celebrities of being ponces, and Captain Cook shows his ignorance of the difference between Dunkirk and D-Day despite being both British and in the (fictional) military. What fun!
Music by Kevin MacLeod
Back again, it's the HMS Gulag! But along for the ride is the Battleship Potemkast, as Quartermaster Stoakes swoops in from his celestial realm, Captain Cook falls in love with a man of God, and you, YES YOU, could win a copy of Rob Stoakes' debut novel Mother and Monster!
Music by Kevin MacLeod & Nobou Uematsu
The Battleship bounds back, with the HMS Gulag on one side and Quartermaster Stoakes' erection on the other. In this week's episode, jetpacks are recommended at E3, astronauts are discouraged from emotion in a review of the film Life, and the New England Patriots join Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather for the greatest sporting event of the year.
Music by Kevin MacLeod
Youtube Video of the Week
Fighting on the Battleship Potemkast! Yes, it's another episode of the best podcast on the web, where the Battleship Boys raise The Mummy from the dead to review, Captain Cook breaks Christy Cree's vrirginity and Quartermaster Stoakes surrenders his fate to a coin.
Music by Kevin MacLeod
Youtube Video of the Week
100 episodes later, and the Battleship Potemkast will change as you know it and also will stay remarkably similar to how it always was. In this especially long and profane celebration, Captain Cook taps into other dimensions, Quartermaster Stoakes is gross, and the DOOM movie is given the critical eye.
Music by Kevin MacLeod
Youtube Video of the Week
"This Is #1 Podcast."
Yes, it's the Battleship Potemkast, where women can beat the vacuum of space one-handed, cinemas are ruined and Steve Gutenberg will save us all. This week, Captain Cook learns about Vietnam with our continuing Aliens retrospective, Quartermaster Stoakes confuses Fences for the new Spawn movie, and we take yet another dive into the Octagon in preparation of UFC 209.
Music by Kevin MacLeod
The Battleship Boys are taking a long, hard look into two things of equal horror; Room 101, and history. Quartermaster Stoakes describes his own personal hell (with a very loose definition of hell) while Captain Cook struggles to say anything. Spoiler warning for historical events; if you have a history class coming up, you may want to skip this episode until the class is over.
Music by Kevin MacLeod and The Sherman Brothers
Escaping from the houses of crazy people is clearly a theme of this week's Battleship Potemkast, as Captain Cook is forced to be nice and Quartermaster Stoakes uses this to his advantage. Meanwhile, Shyamalan throws a plot twist into reality itself in a spoiler-free review of Split, Resident Evil 7 is given a nervous peek and Legs Akimbo is nominated for an Oscar.
Music by Kevin MacLeod
War! Huh! What is it good for? Podcast episodes, that's what, as the Battleship Crew take a long look at war, including Mel Gibson's latest film Hacksaw Ridge, VR games scary enough to give you PTSD, and the Top Five War Films and War Games.
Music by Kevin MacLeod and Ace Waters
A Battleship at war! Yes, this week Captain Cook and Quartermaster Stoakes can't agree or stay in tune, as the benefits of portable gaming are questioned, Nintendo wipes its bottom and there is a review of the newest young-people-in-L.A. film, La La Land!
Music by Kevin MacLeod
There is an intruder on the Battleship this week, as Quartermaster Stoakes interviews fellow film critic Adam Brannon about life as a critic, how to make a career out of it and how it ruins films. Meanwhile, Captain Cook holds the Catholic Church to account, and the Battleship Boys take a journey to Japanese shores to review Martin Scorsese's super long Silence.
Visit Adam Brannon on https://moviemetropolis.net/
Music by Kevin MacLeod, Limp Bizkit and The Black Mages
Yee-haw, it's a roundup on the Battleship Potemkast! With Captain Cook and Quartermaster Stoakes donning their stetsons, mounting their horses and saying "like" a lot, tune in as Antoine Fuqua's name is mispronounced, breasts are discussed, and Indians war over who is the least authentic.
Music by Kevin MacLeod and Arthur Conley
FIGHT! In this new segment, a comedian and a critic vie in bloody battle for your entertainment. Your gladiators, Captain Michael Cook with his army of robots and hackers and Quartermaster Rob Stoakes with his legion of clowns and millionaires, will continue the grand tradition of audiences and reviewers fighting over who's right, and duel to decide what is the greatest movie sequel of all time; Terminator 2 or The Dark Knight!
Music by Kevin MacLeod and Toby Fox
It's the Gentleman's Gaming Gulag where we talk about movies instead. There are many revelations on the ship; Quartermaster Stoakes sucks at war, Captain Cook stands up for Scarlet Witch, and a great journey is made as we get a sneak peek at a 10,000 hour long recording session.
Music by Kevin MacLeod
After finally returning alive and partially well, Stowaway Cree regales Captain Cook and Quartermaster Stoakes with the legality of acid, and the three discuss the joys of being punched in a room full of sweaty men.
On this week's Battleship Potemkast, Captain Cook and Quartermaster Stoakes make up for a lack of homosexuality by talking about Nightcrawler and Wolverine, Martin Luther King Jr makes his first appearance, and we reach into the past for an old fable of desire, Germans and stolen boxers from the currently absent Cree.
On the first (recorded) episode of the as of yet unnamed creative corner, the incredibly smart and devilishly handsome movie critic Rob Stoakes tries to pitch Captain Cook and Stowaway Cree the next Disney film, and Cook and Cree make invalid and stupid complaints.
Would you watch Rob's film? Do you think you can do better? Comment below with your thoughts and ideas for the next creative corner!
